The most common question I get asked is why am I against vaccinations.
Only a few remember the devastation my family went through when I was told my infant had meningitis (which was later told it was encephalitis). No one was there when they surrounded her sticking IV’s in her head as the PICU doctor came and told me the EXACT words she’s probably already brain dead and that it was a waiting game.
No one was there when I finally got the nerve to leave her to drive home long enough to take a shower after being there 4 days and how hard I begged God not to take her. No one was there when I finally walked in the door and fell in the floor with the air knocked out of me screaming at God. Thank God he answered my prayers and she survived.
And that day she became my MIRACLE baby and she is now 8 yrs old.
No one was there 3 yrs later when I went to triage thinking I was in labor just to be told my baby no longer had a heart beat. Not very many can understand the long hours of inducement, constantly looking at the heart monitor praying that the baby’s heartbeat will pop up. Not very many understand the feeling when you finally deliver your sleeping baby and they rush out of the room with her. Not very many understand the feeling when they bring your sleeping baby who was the most gorgeous baby you’d ever laid eyes on all wrapped up just to put her cold cheeks against yours as you say goodbye. Not very many know the feeling of going home empty handed to a house full of siblings wanting answers.
That day she became my ANGEL baby and she would have been 5.
No one was there on those long lonely nights when “every what if’s”ran through my head. No one was there all the times I visited her grave by myself asking why?
No one was there 1 year later on the night after I delivered a perfectly, healthy newborn who latched on immediately, nursed and slept sound until they brought her back from giving her vaccinations then she constantly cried, gagged, spitting up fluids and no longer would latch on. No one was there the long evenings of loud pitch screaming in the evenings of her 2 and 4 months vaccinations that continued during the weeks just to be told colic. No one was there through the everlasting fevers and fussiness. No one was there through the sleepless nights as I researched what could be going on with her. No one was there when I started questioning the vaccines and the fear I had if I would stop vaccinating and put her on a delay schedule. No one was there as I was bullied into just one vaccine and the reaction she had that evening. She was 15 months old. She woke up that evening not herself and couldn’t walk. Took her to ER and they said it wasn’t the vaccines that she could have broken her leg. I was flabbergasted! She didn’t walk for over a week and it was pitiful! That’s the last vaccine she had. She was the baby after my stillborn and the day she was born was the day she became my RAINBOW baby.
No one was there when I seen the horrible deaths caused by vaccinations in a infant and child loss group during sleepless nights as I was pregnant with my last child. No one was there when I dug deeper and found out how horrific vaccinations really was. No one was there when I found out that vaccines cause meningitis and encephalitis. No one was there when I found out the horrible FACTS about the rhogam shot during pregnancy and how many of the same women was going through what I did. No one was there when I started sobbing when I read that if the antibodies from the rhogam shot gets to the fetus it would kill it and how pointless the rhogam shot was during pregnancy.
No one was there when I had my last child a few months later and it was time for her 2 months vaccinations when I got on my knees as I looked at her sleeping peacefully with tears rolling down my face because I was scared! I knew I was going to get bullied by the pediatrician, I knew she was going to make me feel guilty as if I’m putting her in danger. Then my feelings started changing again. I didn’t know WHAT to believe. I closed my eyes and I begged God through tears to please please give me a sign what he wants me to do! I begged so hard. I got up and opened my bible and the very first thing I read was
Jesus said, “It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick”. And when I say the first thing, honest to God that was the first thing I seen!
I instantly got chills as I felt his presence. It was the most peaceful feeling in the world. I started crying and laughing at the same time but I’m not going to lie….I was scared! My heart was beating so fast. I then called the pediatrician’s office and canceled her appointment.
That was the day I realized she was my SUNSHINE baby and she is now 2.
After all the dark storms I had went through, I finally see sunshine. I realized vaccinations caused my life so much darkness and how no one would be there afterwards if vaccinations would have caused death in my children. I would be all alone like every other grieving mother trying to get her story heard.
I have no doubt God was trying to wake me up. There is NOTHING godly about vaccinations and I had realized I had been living in fear and trusting poison over my Lord Savior. I realized vaccinations are made from Satan himself.
So there is my explanation in every detail. I now see vaccine injured kids daily. Their parents think it’s normal or genetic. Seeing the innocent children effects me deeply.
And this is why I share. I know there are mothers out there with an open mind that will listen!